Friday, February 17, 2012

RIP Gary Carter, The Kid #8 --- Heaven got their backstop now.

Mex can barely get through this interview. Tough, Carter was pretty much the final piece of that 86 team and really they should have won more. Tough day for Met fans my age and a bit older who idolized just about every player on that team. Funny how all his on the field accomplishments are not even being mentioned, instead people recall stories of his character. Must have been a tremendous guy.

Tuesday, February 07, 2012

Super Bowl Video

Definetely too much information.

My balls are huge man. I say that seriously. I have some large ass nutsacks. Shit is uncomfortable at times. And I don't mean like, oh i have big balls lets go jump off a building or something. I mean they are just large in circumference. Big heavy balls. My wife hates my balls.

Friday, December 30, 2011

Soon 2011 will end

Hey have the best 2012 you can possibly have ok. Try not to be a dick and tell your family you love them.

Friday, December 23, 2011

Wednesday, December 14, 2011

Annual El Padrino Christmas List

As usual I really want all of this shit and as usual will get nothing. Fucking Santa.

Still waiting on that Taser asshole. Make with it ya fat fuck.

Listening to the soft sounds of Sade while taking a grinder would be pretty fucking awesome in my opinion.

A suite little radio controller helicopter like the one that schmuck plays with in Brookstone to try and get you to walk into the store. I stand outside the store and watch it. Pisses them off.

Kindle Fire.

Call of Duty X-Box the most gigs possible even though I will never use more than 75% of them. It's a dick measuring issue. Gotta have the gigs.

Keurig machine. The one that makes iced tea too, ya know, when I'm feeling faggoty.

Authentic Jose Reyes Marlin jersey so I can take a corn shit on it and mail it to his mother in the domincan republic.

Daddy wants a big green egg.

Ruhlman's Twenty Cookbook

Messermeister knives.

Pair of Johnston & Murphy Suffolk Venetian Black Shoe. And the Penn Slip-On's

Bose earplugs.

Bottle of Gentleman's Jack.

Portable Soundock, preferable from SONY.

I need underwear. Boxers. Don't care from where. As long as they can withstand numerous aerial assaults.

Flavorizer bars, mine are worn out.

And as always Santa, you can bring me a shoebox full of twenties.

Friday, December 09, 2011

He smiled at me

The best Christmas song is Little Drummer Boy. The best version or recording of this song is performed by the Harry Simeone Chorale.

The debate ends here.

Tuesday, November 29, 2011

Wednesday, November 16, 2011

SMH

"There's a doctor in Belgrade that just does this procedure the best of anywhere I've seen it. They take your clitoris and basically, kind of, use certain ligaments and stuff--make it a little bit bigger, release it, wire it so you can take a graft from your cheek...and they lengthen your urethra through it so you can urinate, and they put in testicular implants. You know, it'll be small, but you're going to be able to urinate through it...You'll be able to pee standing up....For me, the ultimate would be able to penetrate and have feeling." - Chazz Bono

If there were ever a senario in which God texted his son Jesus (which I believe happens) the letters "SMH" would be in play here.

Goodness.

Monday, November 14, 2011

Kindle Fire

good read on the Amazon guy.

Amazon is pretty damn good by the way.

Friday, November 04, 2011

working papers

Teaching work values at an early age. Don't judge.



Threesome

Saturday, October 29, 2011

Friday, October 28, 2011

Lets Go Mets

25 years ago last night I was 6 years old. And with my dad I watched the Mets win the 1986 World Championship. It was a nice memory. I remember he jumped up in the air and banged his head on the ceiling fan. I didn't go to the parade but he did. He cleaned up after too. Worked for Dept. of Sanitation. He said he was never happier than that day to clean up a big mess like that. Compared to the NYE Times Square cleanup this was heaven. It's been awhile since the Mets won anything other than a division or wild card here and there.

Been too long. Happy Anniversary 86' Mets.

Friday, October 21, 2011

Nuts

This is. Well..... this is just nuts.

Dressed for Dinner from adam kimmel on Vimeo.

Wednesday, October 19, 2011

Like a boss

Gnocchi in brown butter.



Thursday, October 13, 2011

have you ever wondered?

How much shrimp would I have to eat at Red Lobster's "Endless Shrimp for $15.99" promotion to make it a net financial loss for the restaurant?

Answer: I work at Red Lobster. I don't know the specifics anymore, but our discount is huge. A big savings comes from the fact that all the shrimp is farmed, peeled, and prepped in Asia. It comes to the stores already breaded or with the sauce frozen to the shrimp puck. The Mexicans just drop it in the grease...

So Basically like 200 shrimps minimum. doubt anyone other than Joey Chestnut can bankrupt a Red Lobster on this deal.

"the Mexicans just drop it in the grease" is priceless.

Tuesday, October 04, 2011

Spreads

An Option spread, the way i remember this stuff is by using these initials. ESSD.

Equal number of options
Same Class
Same Underlying Stock
Different strike or expiration

It's a buy and sell of the option so short call, sell and long call buy. Written and purchased on the same stock, same amount with a different strike or expiration date.

Two calls is a call spread, two puts is a put spread.

There are many spreads to do and most investors stick to basics, few however use exotic spreads.

Basics are bull and bear spreads. Bull meaning the object of the strategy is to have the underlying stock go up in value whereas the bear spread is the opposite.

Debit spreads and credit spreads are also basic strategies used.

The margin requirement on any spread is simply the same as a naked option. So whichever side is the sell would be the naked part and that's where you'd figure the option requirement. so 20% of the underlying stock price plus premium.

Friday, September 30, 2011

Options 101

A call option is a right to buy shares at a set price (The strike price).
The investor wants to see the stock rise in price, this raises the intrinsic value of the option. As well as allows the long side to call away shares to buy at a lower price.

A put option is a right to sell at the strike price, investor of a long put wants to see the underlying stock drop so he can sell high.

A short call is when an investor writes or sells a call option. There is unlimited risk to this strategy because the price, theoretically, can go to infinity. Where as a naked put, the price can bottom at zero. Normally investors do this to take in the premium. The premium is the price of the option. so if the premium is $1.25 and the investor thinks the call will rise, betting the underlying stock will rise, he'll write a call and collect $125 for each call he writes.

A naked put is when an investor write or sells a put.

The margin requirement of any naked option, put or call is 20% of the underlying stock price plus premium. Example:

Brian writes 1 naked puts of IBM. Strike price is 100 and the premium is $2.00. Stock is trading at $90. So the calculation should be the following.

20% of $90 x 100 + 200 = 2000

First figure out the underlying stock price. That's 100 shares X $90 = 9000
9000 X 20% = 1800 plus premium which is $2.00 x 100 = 200
1800 + 200 = 2000

Your using 100 because one contract of the option you write represents 100 shares.

Wednesday, September 28, 2011

zukes

Fried zucchini, one of my favorites.