Monday, October 19, 2009

Oral Copulation By Force (Vaca Edition)

As I set to embark on a week long trip to the beautiful island of Jamaica I have a couple of lingering thoughts swirling around my head. And lucky for you I will share them with you.

First things first, if I come back and the Phillies are in the world series, shit is getting broked up.

I have to cut my nails before I go.

Shaved chest or leave it alone? I think it growing back faster and thicker is a lie. Since I'm not hairy I just buzz it, but I do shave my balls.

Damn near November, gonna get sunburnt fo sho'. Just out of sheer drunkedness stupidity. And I tan well but 12 hours in the sunm drinking, carrying on, I'm sure something will get burnt up.

Bringing a two year old on the plane. I am now THAT guy. Fuck.

I have Bob Marley's entire catalogue on my Ipod. The only thing that's missing is some dreadlocks.

Powder is key to avoiding a bathing suit rash.

Rum. Is. Delicious.

An Arab on a plane going to Jamaica would be weird right?

If my luggage is over 50LBS and they ask me to pay some sort of fee I will be on the news.

Pics to follow, piece out neighbors.

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