Giddy up it's less than a week from one of my favorite holidays. Super Bowl! For me it's Christmas, Easter, then Super Bowl, then July 4th as my favorite holidays. And dont tell me The Super Bowl isn't a holiday. Cuz it is. Let's do the checklist:
Large gathering with family and friends? : CHECK
Large amount of foods consumed? : CHECK
Yearly occurence? : CHECK
Observance of a national significance accompanied by a celebration or festivities? : CHECK (football)
That about does it. Holiday.
Monday, January 31, 2011
Wednesday, January 26, 2011
Monday, January 24, 2011
Mango Salsa
I wish we lived in a world where no one would get their feelings hurt and everyone would be normal. I don't want to disappoint anyone so please don't have any expectations of my behavior towards you. I will treat you the same. I just want to live, eat and be happy. The human is a fickle beast.
Football trip is back on this year. Gaylord friend wants to see Peyton so it looks like Indy. I want to go to Seattle, stadium/city looks awesome on TV and the internets.
RIP Jack LaLanne, what a legend.
Nothing like a nice artic blast to wake up the ballsack in the morning huh?
Best thing about winter is Mallomars.
I just don't want to be 50 years old and still worrying about money but it seems like that is the way it's going to be. Career change? Maybe. Can't just sit at a desk and collect 250K a year like you used to in this business. Always a bullseye on your back.
I once shot an elephant while in my pajamas. Not sure why he was wearing my pajamas.
Football trip is back on this year. Gaylord friend wants to see Peyton so it looks like Indy. I want to go to Seattle, stadium/city looks awesome on TV and the internets.
RIP Jack LaLanne, what a legend.
Nothing like a nice artic blast to wake up the ballsack in the morning huh?
Best thing about winter is Mallomars.
I just don't want to be 50 years old and still worrying about money but it seems like that is the way it's going to be. Career change? Maybe. Can't just sit at a desk and collect 250K a year like you used to in this business. Always a bullseye on your back.
I once shot an elephant while in my pajamas. Not sure why he was wearing my pajamas.
Wednesday, January 19, 2011
I'm a poet
thought i wanted more
that's insane at it's core
i dont mean to be a bore
but i wanted four
i will never have more
fuck me for wanting four
kids are wonderful but don't put a number on how many you want cuz chances are that number will be reduced severly after having one, unless you are one of those cat freaks or hoarders who hoard children
that is all
that's insane at it's core
i dont mean to be a bore
but i wanted four
i will never have more
fuck me for wanting four
kids are wonderful but don't put a number on how many you want cuz chances are that number will be reduced severly after having one, unless you are one of those cat freaks or hoarders who hoard children
that is all
Thursday, January 13, 2011
My Restaurant Empire
I imagine, because I love food and enjoy company, my restaurant empire all the time. What i'd look like, menu items, locations and most importantly names. I'm a dreamer. Here are the names of my restaurants.
Cheeks - A giant sportsbar, similar to Hooters except the focus is on ass. Womans ass. Is this a riff on Hooters? Some may think so but I'm a leg and ass man not a boob man. Don't get that confused with saying I don't like boobs. I do. But i'd rather bury my face in a perfect ass than perfect boobs. Just sayin. Anyway so I like beer, wings, hot girls all in one place. What that makes me a pervert? A sexist? No, it makes me Amercian. Cheers to Cheeks! Menu would be quintessential bar food, focusing on my wings, my ribs, my burgers and my heros. Beer on tap to the tooth and giant plasmas all over. A true sportsbar. Waitresses would be required to wear poom poom shorts that leave little to the imagination. Itty bitty titties are allowed. Besides, if Hooters aint gonna hire them that's a lot of good asses going to waste. Who wants to invest?
The Musty Butt - This is my dive bar. A hidden gem that the neighborhood ends up falling in love with. Craft beers on tap, rustic dishes you wouldn't expect to find at a musty butt kind of place, a juke box, antique decor, booths, tables, bar seats and character. Everybofy knows everybody, maybe some board games, everything homeade, NO TV's!!!! (except for at the bar) just hood fun.
El Padrino's - Barrio style cheap spanish food. Spanish in a broad sense. I mean all over the map. Mexican specialties like traditional fish tacos, taquitos, flautas, etc. An authentic Tapas menu, a few island dishes like Arroz con pollo, Chulitos, Arepas, Roasted pig, mojo and everything else. Not too fancy but not like a cafeteria somewhere in the middle.
Della Feminia - My Italian venture. Classic neopolitan Italian dishes. Hearty pastas, fine proteins and fresh greens. I would hire an Itlalian pastry baker too so that desserts and late night espresso business was swift and profitable. 10 pastas, 5 pollo selections, 5 veal selections, 5 fish selections and 2 beef selections. Big antipasto menu and deep wine list. For an Italian place to work you have to nail the basics. Perfect sauce, great meatballs, fresh pastas and only the finest imported cheeses. The rest will follow if you can accomplish the basics.
Leonards - My pizzeria. With the craze of the imported ovens from Italy being all the rage I think I'd just rely on a simple coal oven. Just nail the ingredients and the dough. Pizza making, you'd think is easy but it's not. It's hard. There is alot of bad pizza out there. My style would be classic Neopoletana style pizza. Did you know the average american consumes 750 slices or 23 lbs of pizza every year? It sells. The name was my grandfathers confirmation name and was passed down to my dad and myself in the form of a middle name.
Cheeks - A giant sportsbar, similar to Hooters except the focus is on ass. Womans ass. Is this a riff on Hooters? Some may think so but I'm a leg and ass man not a boob man. Don't get that confused with saying I don't like boobs. I do. But i'd rather bury my face in a perfect ass than perfect boobs. Just sayin. Anyway so I like beer, wings, hot girls all in one place. What that makes me a pervert? A sexist? No, it makes me Amercian. Cheers to Cheeks! Menu would be quintessential bar food, focusing on my wings, my ribs, my burgers and my heros. Beer on tap to the tooth and giant plasmas all over. A true sportsbar. Waitresses would be required to wear poom poom shorts that leave little to the imagination. Itty bitty titties are allowed. Besides, if Hooters aint gonna hire them that's a lot of good asses going to waste. Who wants to invest?
The Musty Butt - This is my dive bar. A hidden gem that the neighborhood ends up falling in love with. Craft beers on tap, rustic dishes you wouldn't expect to find at a musty butt kind of place, a juke box, antique decor, booths, tables, bar seats and character. Everybofy knows everybody, maybe some board games, everything homeade, NO TV's!!!! (except for at the bar) just hood fun.
El Padrino's - Barrio style cheap spanish food. Spanish in a broad sense. I mean all over the map. Mexican specialties like traditional fish tacos, taquitos, flautas, etc. An authentic Tapas menu, a few island dishes like Arroz con pollo, Chulitos, Arepas, Roasted pig, mojo and everything else. Not too fancy but not like a cafeteria somewhere in the middle.
Della Feminia - My Italian venture. Classic neopolitan Italian dishes. Hearty pastas, fine proteins and fresh greens. I would hire an Itlalian pastry baker too so that desserts and late night espresso business was swift and profitable. 10 pastas, 5 pollo selections, 5 veal selections, 5 fish selections and 2 beef selections. Big antipasto menu and deep wine list. For an Italian place to work you have to nail the basics. Perfect sauce, great meatballs, fresh pastas and only the finest imported cheeses. The rest will follow if you can accomplish the basics.
Leonards - My pizzeria. With the craze of the imported ovens from Italy being all the rage I think I'd just rely on a simple coal oven. Just nail the ingredients and the dough. Pizza making, you'd think is easy but it's not. It's hard. There is alot of bad pizza out there. My style would be classic Neopoletana style pizza. Did you know the average american consumes 750 slices or 23 lbs of pizza every year? It sells. The name was my grandfathers confirmation name and was passed down to my dad and myself in the form of a middle name.
Monday, January 10, 2011
Making love to food part 1
Sfogliatelle dear, I fucking love you. No it's more than comfortability, I fucking love you. I'm just thinking about our life together. I feel like I'm walking on a cloud. My penis is tingling right now.
I think I'm going to make it my business to eat one of these once a week until the day I die. It is so delicious. I wanna fuck it. Like it's gorgeous and everything. You know?
I think I'm going to make it my business to eat one of these once a week until the day I die. It is so delicious. I wanna fuck it. Like it's gorgeous and everything. You know?
Thursday, January 06, 2011
Monday, January 03, 2011
Life Rule #78
When someone says or uses the phrase/term I'm "out of town" they are lying and/or are murderers. I've watched alot of crime shows and seen a kajillion movies where the alibi for a suspect is "out of town" and almost always without fail that person ends up being the killer.
So you're not fooling me out of towner. Lying criminal.
My boss uses that term alot. Oh I'm out of town. Jerkoff. Probably sitting home watching Maury Povich. When I go somewhere I say "going to PA" "going to jersey" "going to Maryland". I never say I'm going out of town.
Life rule #78 - Out of town = lies/murder.
So you're not fooling me out of towner. Lying criminal.
My boss uses that term alot. Oh I'm out of town. Jerkoff. Probably sitting home watching Maury Povich. When I go somewhere I say "going to PA" "going to jersey" "going to Maryland". I never say I'm going out of town.
Life rule #78 - Out of town = lies/murder.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
