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I wear Levis. They are my choice of denim. Lately I noticed that Levis are making a comeback in the fashion world. I used to be able to pick up a pair at like $40 now places want $158?

No esta english.
One hundred and fifty eight dollars!

Get out. Get the fuck out.

I never understood the balls on people to charge more than $60 for a pair of jeans. And $60, is high ok. I would wrestle an octopuss at a sale rack at the GAP for $20 jeans in my size. I would never pay more than $40, like I said, for any jean. Se7en jeans, which for ladies is different, cost like $180. That could feed 8 kids in Mumbai, India. Anyway I like Levis. They are comfrotable, not white trash, long in the crotch area, seamed perfectly and they used to cost a reasonable dollar amount. Glad I don't need any jeans for awhile.

almonds

Did I post pictures from Jamaica? I went in October, thought I did. Anyway I wanted post soemthing to alleviate the stress the previous post has caused people. This is me and Wolf attempting to crack open an almond. See almonds, unbeknownest to me, have a hard shell fruit over it's exterior shell. Right so it's a shell, fruit, shell, nut. Quite fascinating. The fruit gets destroyed most of the time when these get prcessed but it taste like a sour canape. Which is like a spanish grape. Good times.

things that really twist my sack #63

Shit like this really pisses me off. Why do I have to have a fucking powdered donut hangin from my eyelid? The fuck is it anyway. A stye? Cmon man, doctor at work thought it was pink eye and now this shit. Styes and shit really twist my sack.

The El Pack

I'm working on a cocktail of vitamins that I will market soon. Called the El Pack. This much is true. It will contain:

Vitamin C, 1000 MG (no Rose hips)
L-Lysine, 1000 MG (in two doses of 500MG, Amino Acid)
Vitamin D, 200 MG
Milk Thistle, 100MG (only if you are an occastional drinker like me)
Flax Seed, 100 MG
Vitamin A in the form of Beta Carotene, 50 MG

You take this cocktail daily along with eating a pretty normal diet and you'll live a healthy long life or your money back!

NJ's only redeeming quality

You know, there are fewer things I love in life than sitting at a poker table in Atlantic City, NJ winning cold hard cash. The gambling gods smiled down upon the during this trip. I came home with a clean $900. Most of my winnings came at the Bonus Texas Hold Em table. $10 minimum is not so bad it ends up costing $30 just to see the flop. Extra if you play the bonus which you should because that is where you win the real scratch. I hit pocket rockets once (Aces) which pays 30-1, and I was putting $10 on the bonus each hand. Hit Kings twice, (10-1), A-K suited, (25-1), A-J unsuited (5-1) and alot of low pocket pairs, (3-1). Plus I was betting my hands cleverly and not wasting bets by chasing straights or flushes.

Three card poker was another great success. It's a simple game, around the way it's called "Balls". We would play it all night exchanging money back and forth for hours. Basically, you get three cards and if you beat the dealer you win. However there is a decision to make, you can't just go in with 2, 7, J unless they are suited. That would be a flush and would pay 3-1 plus if you beat the dealer. The dealer qualifies with a Q high which is good. It's low enough to be crap a good amount of time. The basic principle of the game is poker just with 3 cards instead of 5. Bonus payout are the best, straights pay 6-1, straight flushes 50-1, trips, 30-1 and the mini royal (AKQ suited) pays 100-1. At $15 minims that's alot of oreos.

I lost about $300 in 20 minutes in Caesers three card and was tight. I saw my wife walking around and she had just loss about $100 on the slots. So I wanted to leave, I had like $30 on me and she proposed we play roulette. You all know how roulette works so we play and the 2nd spin I hit a number for $2 which = $72. Nice. Then I hit again, and again, and again. All in all I walked away with $250 I was back! I love gambling. That's when I took that $250 and went to the Tropicana and busted that Texas Hold Em game up in it's ass. Good times.

By the way the Borgata, holy shit, is fucking nice. Reminds me of a Vegas style hotel. Flashy, contemporary, shiny and loaded with great places to eat and party. If they comp me, which I expect, I will have to take the lady there just us. It's a sexy place.

Clover used to explain the Holy Trinity

St. Patricks Day. Everyone is Irish today even if your not. My grandmother was part Irish, her last name was Brannigan. Most of my cousins are Irish, my aunts parents were Irish. Corned beef dinner at their house tonight. With some soda bread, cabbage and beer. It's a suite meal.

Somewhere a firefighter or two is drunk right now. I stay away from the bar scene on a day like today because of all the amateurs that crowd them. It's like people forget how to drink on days like today. Not to mention the cult like following of firefighters from a pack of floozy horny messes.

Some Irish beers I've enjoyed in the past and will enjoy in the future are:

Harp Lager
Guinness, which by the way is treated with dried fish air bladders
Smithwicks Irish Red Ale

Operation sculpted abs

I'm gonna get my six-pack back. It's the 2010 Six-Pack challenge. El Pad style. My plan is to be rocking, rock hard abs again. Preferably by the summer. Here's how.

Phase One

Eating better. I've always been a pretty good eater. See my appetite has always been the same. Big. I could throw down some food. My metabolism was super fast though. Over the past couple of years that puppy has slowed a bit. Causing my ginourmous food portions to hang on to my body. So Phase One begins with eating less. If I eat less my metabolism will probably work quicker or at the least have a lighter load to churn through.

Drinking less too. It was farily common for me to throw down some dinner, a snack or two and 4 or 5 beers on a Tuesday night. Can't do that if I want a six pack.

Phase Two

Excercise but old school. Push ups, situps, core ab excercises I can do at home. I'm not going to the gym. Got suckered into that 3 or 4 times and always ended up just donating money. See I don't want to lift weights. I just want definition. Think ninja. Not bodybuilder.

Phase Three

Adopt the lifestyle in Phase One and Two. Moderation.

Catching up

Been busy lately, got promoted and they said they would delegate more work to me. They were not lying.

What the fuck with the 3d shit? Wasn't this like 20 years ago. Why do I have to wear these glasses? If they shoot in 3D the glasses should be extinct. I'm not a nerd. But this has gone too far. I refuse to wear silly looking glasses.

Offal. Look it up.

When I was selling pot way back when my distributor, sort of speak, was a big fat white dude with a great beard. He owned a likka* sto* and reminded me of that likka sto worker character in the movie "Superbad". The one who had to mop up the mess. His name was Carl. Carl, if your still alive. You rocked bro. You rocked.

Asparagus makes everyones pee smell funny except mine. I want my pee to smell funny too.

Anyone have a sibling? Aren't they so fucking annoying.

I should be eating way more ice cream than I do. I mean I never fucking eat it. Why? I don't understand. It's so good.

Does anyone have a problem with guys who growing up had a name like JJ or JP or DJ yet they still answer and respond to that name. Like use your given name man. Your 36 years old now. JP doesnt fly anymore. Unless your name is fucked up like Jumbo or something. Then slap your mom.

Baseball. Real soon.

Things that really twist my sack #45

Toaster Ovens. On the surface toaster ovens seem like a tremendous idea. And they are. But over saturation of the product has turned this little genius ideas into lil hot boxes of hate. I hate them. They suck. They incinerate everything within 10 minutes, there is no in between. The dials are not precise. The crumbs, if not cleared out every day, burn and smell and need to be cleaned. The tray it comes with does the same thing except worse. It stains, burns, needs washing, etc. This fucking toaster oven is like a goddamn baby. I wouldn't be surprised if it asked me for milk one day. Black and Decker is the manufacter but it's not there fault. They make a fine cordless screwdriver so I can't hate on them. And I've had other toaster ovens. They are all the same. The prior one I had I was trying to broil some cheese on a pizza and the glass door exploded. No lie. Shit exploded. Fucking toaster ovens are on the list of things that really twist my sack.

Aquarium pics

Sea life is cool. Agree?