Firepower

My Bicep, Spetember 28 2007.

Have a nice weekend, I will be hangin from noose til Monday.
Whether or not the floor from under me will open is up to the New York Mets.

LETS GO METS!

This pennant race is taking years off my life.

Dear Nipple Man

I have to talk about something. And we all know I am not a homosexual, not that there is anything wrong with that. Well there is but that's another post so for now I must talk about men and nipples.

Open letter to men who work in an office:

Please stop buying shirts that allow your nipples to protrude through the shirt. And if you do buy these said shirts please put on a Ginny-T (A-Shirt for you midwesterners) underneath the shirt so no nipple protrusion occurs. One of life's mysteries is why do men even have nipples but who am I to question the magic of Jehovah God. They must serve some sort of purpose and maybe one day we will find out. Until then please keep them from staring me down through your 80/20 Lycra Cotton beige polo you picked up at Nordstrom's the other day. It's disturbing.

Thank You and Regards.

P.S- To the guy who fills up 8 cups of coffee from the Flavia machine while people wait behind you : Die.

This, That and This and up

I really hate the fat guy (easy 400lbs) with the soul patch on his chin. It's one thing to have the gonads to rock a soul patch but it's entirely another thing to have 8 chins and have the said soul patch look like a small bush on a plain of rolling hills.

My main beef with cheese is what's the point? American cheese more specifically. It does not have a significant taste. If it doesn't provide a twist on whatever your putting it on what's the point? It's only going to make you fat. The reason why America is fat is because of three things.

Over-indulgence. Soda. Condiments/Dressings/Dipping Sauces.

Cheese would fall under over-indulgence I guess. I mean your ordering french fries already, is it imperative that they come slathetred with cheese? AND believe me I over-indulge all the time. Half this rant is coming from personal experience but I'll be damned if one day I wake up and I can't see my wedding tackle cuz my fat stomach is in the way. Fuck that.

The retard who orders a salad and then pours a 1000 calorie dressing over it is not only a retard but might be insane. Or the mental midget who orders a big mac with a diet coke.
What is the thought process there? Please don't tell me Diet Soda taste better than non-diet soda cuz I'll punch ya in your teef if you do.

Go the extra mile.......


when trying to ruin someone's day.


A little effort. Laziness is a plague but it's fun. How many days do you think you've all wasted by sitting on the couch and doing absolutely dick all day? Isn't is awesome. Meanwhile some Indian kid is programming a computer and re-writing programs in hopes of one day taking a job away from an unsuspecting middle aged American named Joe. Terriffic. And this is Bush's fault too right.

Atta boy O.J. Way to flash those roots.

Guys

Hanging out with the boys is always a great time. I can't get enough of it.
I just booked the annual Football trip where me and the boys hit up an out of town game for the weekend. This is the third year in doing so.

Year one was Atlanta. Highlights included the Waffle House, Wahngs not wings, the gas station on Peachtree Blvd., Mike Vick blowing a game via the fumble, taking the rail (which goes East, West, North and South - like a cross) and running thru the airport in order to NOT miss our flight home.

Last year was Green Bay. Highlights included 30 cans of Pabst Blue Ribbon (PBR), Patriot fans with blue cheese heads, vomiting and shitting at the same time, the Mich/O State game, and of course Lambeau and the beauty of that town.

and this year is Chicago.
Bears/Lions Oct. 28th, Soilder Field. Can't wait.

Let's get one thing clear, I love my wife. Love spending time with her of course. But the hangin with the boys is sacred stuff.

Keep Fighting Terror

It's a fucked up day. But 6 years ago I realized it was a fucked up world.

Today I remember the 2,974 victims of the September 11th attacks.

I wallowed in their ashes that day, and I will never forget them. To me, in my head, I want to say I know them all.

Sitting at your desk, eating breakfast, then BAM! A fucking jetliner plows into your cubicle.
And the poor firefighters than went up to get them, 343 of them. Poor souls.

Fuck you Al Qaeda. Things will never be the same again. I hope the war on terror lasts forever.

God Bless them and God bless America.