Unfuckingbelievable.
When I catch my breath I'll post.
Monday, July 30, 2007
Emma Riley
I had a baby girl. No really, I did.
Unfuckingbelievable.
When I catch my breath I'll post.
Unfuckingbelievable.
When I catch my breath I'll post.
Thursday, July 26, 2007
10 Things I've never done before
1. Never been skydiving
2. Never joined the Mile High club
3. Never had my prostate "milked"
4. Never flew a kite
5. Never smoked weed out of a bong (I'm very distraught about this)
6. Never put anything on "layaway" (despite being broke 90% of my life)
7. Never danced the Tango
8. Never played Yahtzee
9. Never fought a midget
10. Never rocked suspenders
2. Never joined the Mile High club
3. Never had my prostate "milked"
4. Never flew a kite
5. Never smoked weed out of a bong (I'm very distraught about this)
6. Never put anything on "layaway" (despite being broke 90% of my life)
7. Never danced the Tango
8. Never played Yahtzee
9. Never fought a midget
10. Never rocked suspenders
Monday, July 23, 2007
The Summer Wind
R&R
Pa this past weekend. Up by the Poconos. Town called Lake Ariel in a gated community called "The Hideout". It's a nice little getaway. Only about 2-3 hours away. We took a chance on going with the miz el pad being 9 months pregnant but it worked out ok. No woods baby for us.
Plus the guys need a mental break too ya know, I mean I realize your carrying an extra 30 lbs and all but 10 months is a long time for us too. Jus sayin'.
This past weekend included:
Beer, tennis, wiffle ball, basketball, fishing, bike riding, bbq'n, horseshoes, and Bocce Ball .
Good times.
Short and sweet, I got TPS up my ass lately.....
Pa this past weekend. Up by the Poconos. Town called Lake Ariel in a gated community called "The Hideout". It's a nice little getaway. Only about 2-3 hours away. We took a chance on going with the miz el pad being 9 months pregnant but it worked out ok. No woods baby for us.
Plus the guys need a mental break too ya know, I mean I realize your carrying an extra 30 lbs and all but 10 months is a long time for us too. Jus sayin'.
This past weekend included:
Beer, tennis, wiffle ball, basketball, fishing, bike riding, bbq'n, horseshoes, and Bocce Ball .
Good times.
Short and sweet, I got TPS up my ass lately.....
Thursday, July 19, 2007
worn like a old sherpa
I'm worn out, got nothing new. Work is a nightmare so I give movie qoutes that make me fell better when i see them. If your looking for something original and clever you got the wrong blog today. As the Chinese say, so sorry.
Glengarry Glen Ross
These are the new leads. These are the Glengarry leads. And to you they're gold, and you don't get them. Why? Because to give them to you would be throwing them away. They're for closers.
PUT THAT COFFEE DOWN! Coffee is for closers!
All train compartments smell vaguely of shit. It gets so you don't mind it. That's the worst thing that I can confess. You know how long it took me to get there? A long time. When you die you're going to regret the things you don't do. You think you're queer? I'm going to tell you something: we're all queer. You think you're a thief? So what? You get befuddled by a middle-class morality? Get shut of it. Shut it out. You cheat on your wife? You did it, live with it. You fuck little girls, so be it. There's an absolute morality? Maybe. And then what? If you think there is, go ahead, be that thing. Bad people go to hell? I don't think so. If you think that, act that way. A hell exists on earth? Yes. I won't live in it. That's me.
You ever take a dump made you feel like you'd just slept for twelve hours?
You want to know what it takes to sell real estate? It takes BRASS BALLS to sell real estate.
You stupid fucking cunt. You, Williamson, I'm talking to you, shithead. You just cost me $6,000. Six thousand dollars, and one Cadillac. That's right. What are you going to do about it? What are you going to do about it, asshole? You're fucking shit. Where did you learn your trade, you stupid fucking cunt, you idiot? Who ever told you that you could work with men? Oh, I'm gonna have your job, shithead.
American Psycho
Harold, it's Bateman, Patrick Bateman. You're my lawyer so I think you should know: I've killed a lot of people. Some girls in the apartment uptown uh, some homeless people maybe 5 or 10 um an NYU girl I met in Central Park. I left her in a parking lot behind some donut shop. I killed Bethany, my old girlfriend, with a nail gun, and some man uh some old faggot with a dog last week. I killed another girl with a chainsaw, I had to, she almost got away and uh someone else there I can't remember maybe a model, but she's dead too. And Paul Allen. I killed Paul Allen with an axe in the face, his body is dissolving in a bathtub in Hell's Kitchen. I don't want to leave anything out here. I guess I've killed maybe 20 people, maybe 40. I have tapes of a lot of it, uh some of the girls have seen the tapes. I even, um... I ate some of their brains, and I tried to cook a little. Tonight I, uh, I just had to kill a LOT of people. And I'm not sure I'm gonna get away with it this time. I guess I'll uh, I mean, ah, I guess I'm a pretty uh, I mean I guess I'm a pretty sick guy. So, if you get back tomorrow, meet me at Harry's Bar, so you know, keep your eyes open.
I want you to clean your vagina.
A Few Good Men
Son, we live in a world that has walls, and those walls have to be guarded by men with guns. Whose gonna do it? You? You, Lt. Weinburg? I have a greater responsibility than you could possibly fathom. You weep for Santiago, and you curse the marines. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know. That Santiago's death, while tragic, probably saved lives. And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves lives. You don't want the truth because deep down in places you don't talk about at parties, you want me on that wall, you need me on that wall. We use words like honor, code, loyalty. We use these words as the backbone of a life spent defending something. You use them as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very freedom that I provide, and then questions the manner in which I provide it. I would rather you just said thank you, and went on your way, Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a weapon, and stand a post. Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you are entitled to.
I run my unit how I run my unit. You want to investigate me, roll the dice and take your chances. I eat breakfast 300 yards from 4000 Cubans who are trained to kill me, so don't think for one second that you can come down here, flash a badge, and make me nervous.
Absolutely. My answer is I don't have the first damn clue. Maybe he was an early riser and liked to pack in the morning. And maybe he didn't have any friends. I'm an educated man, but I'm afraid I can't speak intelligently about the travel habits of William Santiago. What I do know is that he was set to leave the base at 0600. Now, are these the questions I was really called here to answer? Phone calls and foot lockers? Please tell me that you have something more, Lieutenant. These two Marines are on trial for their lives. Please tell me their lawyer hasn't pinned their hopes to a phone bill.
End scene.
Glengarry Glen Ross
These are the new leads. These are the Glengarry leads. And to you they're gold, and you don't get them. Why? Because to give them to you would be throwing them away. They're for closers.
PUT THAT COFFEE DOWN! Coffee is for closers!
All train compartments smell vaguely of shit. It gets so you don't mind it. That's the worst thing that I can confess. You know how long it took me to get there? A long time. When you die you're going to regret the things you don't do. You think you're queer? I'm going to tell you something: we're all queer. You think you're a thief? So what? You get befuddled by a middle-class morality? Get shut of it. Shut it out. You cheat on your wife? You did it, live with it. You fuck little girls, so be it. There's an absolute morality? Maybe. And then what? If you think there is, go ahead, be that thing. Bad people go to hell? I don't think so. If you think that, act that way. A hell exists on earth? Yes. I won't live in it. That's me.
You ever take a dump made you feel like you'd just slept for twelve hours?
You want to know what it takes to sell real estate? It takes BRASS BALLS to sell real estate.
You stupid fucking cunt. You, Williamson, I'm talking to you, shithead. You just cost me $6,000. Six thousand dollars, and one Cadillac. That's right. What are you going to do about it? What are you going to do about it, asshole? You're fucking shit. Where did you learn your trade, you stupid fucking cunt, you idiot? Who ever told you that you could work with men? Oh, I'm gonna have your job, shithead.
American Psycho
Harold, it's Bateman, Patrick Bateman. You're my lawyer so I think you should know: I've killed a lot of people. Some girls in the apartment uptown uh, some homeless people maybe 5 or 10 um an NYU girl I met in Central Park. I left her in a parking lot behind some donut shop. I killed Bethany, my old girlfriend, with a nail gun, and some man uh some old faggot with a dog last week. I killed another girl with a chainsaw, I had to, she almost got away and uh someone else there I can't remember maybe a model, but she's dead too. And Paul Allen. I killed Paul Allen with an axe in the face, his body is dissolving in a bathtub in Hell's Kitchen. I don't want to leave anything out here. I guess I've killed maybe 20 people, maybe 40. I have tapes of a lot of it, uh some of the girls have seen the tapes. I even, um... I ate some of their brains, and I tried to cook a little. Tonight I, uh, I just had to kill a LOT of people. And I'm not sure I'm gonna get away with it this time. I guess I'll uh, I mean, ah, I guess I'm a pretty uh, I mean I guess I'm a pretty sick guy. So, if you get back tomorrow, meet me at Harry's Bar, so you know, keep your eyes open.
I want you to clean your vagina.
A Few Good Men
Son, we live in a world that has walls, and those walls have to be guarded by men with guns. Whose gonna do it? You? You, Lt. Weinburg? I have a greater responsibility than you could possibly fathom. You weep for Santiago, and you curse the marines. You have that luxury. You have the luxury of not knowing what I know. That Santiago's death, while tragic, probably saved lives. And my existence, while grotesque and incomprehensible to you, saves lives. You don't want the truth because deep down in places you don't talk about at parties, you want me on that wall, you need me on that wall. We use words like honor, code, loyalty. We use these words as the backbone of a life spent defending something. You use them as a punchline. I have neither the time nor the inclination to explain myself to a man who rises and sleeps under the blanket of the very freedom that I provide, and then questions the manner in which I provide it. I would rather you just said thank you, and went on your way, Otherwise, I suggest you pick up a weapon, and stand a post. Either way, I don't give a damn what you think you are entitled to.
I run my unit how I run my unit. You want to investigate me, roll the dice and take your chances. I eat breakfast 300 yards from 4000 Cubans who are trained to kill me, so don't think for one second that you can come down here, flash a badge, and make me nervous.
Absolutely. My answer is I don't have the first damn clue. Maybe he was an early riser and liked to pack in the morning. And maybe he didn't have any friends. I'm an educated man, but I'm afraid I can't speak intelligently about the travel habits of William Santiago. What I do know is that he was set to leave the base at 0600. Now, are these the questions I was really called here to answer? Phone calls and foot lockers? Please tell me that you have something more, Lieutenant. These two Marines are on trial for their lives. Please tell me their lawyer hasn't pinned their hopes to a phone bill.
End scene.
Tuesday, July 17, 2007
Friday, July 13, 2007
34 to 36
I'm not so sure how to go about this. But I have a dilemma.
See, this is kind of the first time this has happened to me. And I want to nip it in the bud now before it's too late.
What am I talking about you ask?
Well, it has come to my attention that I, El Padrino, have put on a few pounds.
Coming from a kid who used to rock a strong six pack it's alarming.
So I bought a bike.
But since my fucking shithole job sucks the blood from my brain I find it hard to rise up at 5:30 am and ride that damn thing. But when I do it's all positive. My routine is to ride the bike about a mile or so to a specific park and treat that park like a gym. Do some chin ups, push ups, stretch out the muslces and other various core excercies. About 45 minutes. Productive but again, waking up is the hardest part.
Part two of my crisis is my diet. I should probably stop eating 4 slices of pizza. I may want to tone down the desserts and I may want to stop eating lunch portions the size of Gaum. Just a thought.
Now I know food. And I know what's good for you and whatnot but with all the fads out there I'm a bit lost. There is no way I am giving up all carbs. So that's out. And one more thing. This diet has to include the daily consumption of beer (and wine). Because if you think for one second that I will be switching to some pussy lite beer or that I will stop drinking beer totally just for some diet your are on crack cocaine.
So if there is no diet out there that can meet my terms I will be forced to use my "knowledge of a little about everything" and create my own. Patent it, write 6 million books, become rich and become the poor man's John Basedow.
See, this is kind of the first time this has happened to me. And I want to nip it in the bud now before it's too late.
What am I talking about you ask?
Well, it has come to my attention that I, El Padrino, have put on a few pounds.
Coming from a kid who used to rock a strong six pack it's alarming.
So I bought a bike.
But since my fucking shithole job sucks the blood from my brain I find it hard to rise up at 5:30 am and ride that damn thing. But when I do it's all positive. My routine is to ride the bike about a mile or so to a specific park and treat that park like a gym. Do some chin ups, push ups, stretch out the muslces and other various core excercies. About 45 minutes. Productive but again, waking up is the hardest part.
Part two of my crisis is my diet. I should probably stop eating 4 slices of pizza. I may want to tone down the desserts and I may want to stop eating lunch portions the size of Gaum. Just a thought.
Now I know food. And I know what's good for you and whatnot but with all the fads out there I'm a bit lost. There is no way I am giving up all carbs. So that's out. And one more thing. This diet has to include the daily consumption of beer (and wine). Because if you think for one second that I will be switching to some pussy lite beer or that I will stop drinking beer totally just for some diet your are on crack cocaine.
So if there is no diet out there that can meet my terms I will be forced to use my "knowledge of a little about everything" and create my own. Patent it, write 6 million books, become rich and become the poor man's John Basedow.
Wednesday, July 11, 2007
beer and meat
Democrats make me sick
what does this guy know that we dont
My beer rotation currently looks like this:
Corona (summertime), Sam Adams summer ale, Sierra Nevada Pale Ale, Brooklyn 55' Pennant Ale, Brooklyn Lager, DAB (Dortmunder), and Peroni.
The fucking news is depressing out there.
Now I really don't read but I bought this book because i enjoy travel and travelling and I would like to hit up many many places. I recommend it.
1000 places to see before you die
They got some cool shit in here And even though I'm more interested in what I can do in the states I do want to get around to Italy, every island I can see and Europe (and Australia).
Fuck the muslim shit I want no part of that.
Mama En Feugo (who's linked on the right) is into photography. So this link is for her.
cool nyc phot blog, just keep hitting previous to see more pics
fur dem texas boys that think ny aint got good bbq
i can get anything, i repeat, ANYTHING in nyc
this harry potter shit is nuts, i've never seen any of these movies
should I? isnt it for the chitlins?
man a chipwhich sounds real good right about now
what does this guy know that we dont
My beer rotation currently looks like this:
Corona (summertime), Sam Adams summer ale, Sierra Nevada Pale Ale, Brooklyn 55' Pennant Ale, Brooklyn Lager, DAB (Dortmunder), and Peroni.
The fucking news is depressing out there.
Now I really don't read but I bought this book because i enjoy travel and travelling and I would like to hit up many many places. I recommend it.
1000 places to see before you die
They got some cool shit in here And even though I'm more interested in what I can do in the states I do want to get around to Italy, every island I can see and Europe (and Australia).
Fuck the muslim shit I want no part of that.
Mama En Feugo (who's linked on the right) is into photography. So this link is for her.
cool nyc phot blog, just keep hitting previous to see more pics
fur dem texas boys that think ny aint got good bbq
i can get anything, i repeat, ANYTHING in nyc
this harry potter shit is nuts, i've never seen any of these movies
should I? isnt it for the chitlins?
man a chipwhich sounds real good right about now
Thursday, July 05, 2007
keep the juice loose
In light of Chesnut's astounding 66 dogs in 12 minutes I was perusing this site IFOCE .
Competitive eating is awesome.
That site produced the following Wikipedia searches.
Shoo-Fly Pie
Turduckens
Mince Pie
Kolaches
Jiaozi
Horseshoe sandwich
Fry bread
I'm disgusted but happy.
Carry on.
Competitive eating is awesome.
That site produced the following Wikipedia searches.
Shoo-Fly Pie
Turduckens
Mince Pie
Kolaches
Jiaozi
Horseshoe sandwich
Fry bread
I'm disgusted but happy.
Carry on.
66 hot dogs but
First let's congratulate Joey Chestnut on bringing back the Mustard Belt to USA!
4th of july used to be my favorite holiday
Until of course Rudolph Giuliani became mayor and vowed to wipe the city clean of fireworks. This had every cop hopped up to bust hard working men for trafficking jumping jacks.
It was a despicable law. For as far back as I can remember I lit fireworks on the 4th of july.
Little shit, nothing crazy. You know, some whistlers, saturn missles, assorted cakes, fountains, firecrackers, pinwheels and helicopters. My pops used to bring home garbage bags full and we used to go down to my unc's house and light every last one of them. Those days are long gone.
I'll leave you with some firework pics. These are the one's live from NY, which is televised on NBC across the country.
Courtesy of Gothamist blog
4th of july used to be my favorite holiday
Until of course Rudolph Giuliani became mayor and vowed to wipe the city clean of fireworks. This had every cop hopped up to bust hard working men for trafficking jumping jacks.
It was a despicable law. For as far back as I can remember I lit fireworks on the 4th of july.
Little shit, nothing crazy. You know, some whistlers, saturn missles, assorted cakes, fountains, firecrackers, pinwheels and helicopters. My pops used to bring home garbage bags full and we used to go down to my unc's house and light every last one of them. Those days are long gone.
I'll leave you with some firework pics. These are the one's live from NY, which is televised on NBC across the country.
Courtesy of Gothamist blog
Monday, July 02, 2007
shower me with gifts minions
Yesterday was the baby shower. Got lots of shit. High chairs, swings, tubs, diapers and all that shit. Great job by all. I would have liked maybe some new grilling tongs or a couple of polo's but hey I understand it's not for me. Looking at the pile of stuff in the empty room in my apartment is making me realize we dont have much time life. Nervous? No. More like aniticipating.
Anyway while the View was at the shower I put on a bbq back at Unc's house for the fellas. It was glorious. Hot, but glorious. Here's a pic.
No we didnt eat raw Italian sausage. I cooked them. Menu was S&P (sausage and peppers), polish kilebasa and brats. For dinner later that afternoon when the ladies came back we had filet mignons, grilled red taters, string bean salad, pasta salad, cayenne shrimp, a couple of focaccia's and rigatoni carbonara.
A+.
First of the the S&P was off the meat rack hotter than a Biggie track. If food were used as currency I'd use the S&P has fifty dollar bills. Yup. Grant's son.
So Corona's, Stella's some red sangria and regular red wine were the beverage options. All that was missing were some waitresses. If they would work for S&P maybe I'd hire them next time.
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